OnMidafternoonInebriationBrusheswithPromiscuityandGoingAWOL
I arrived back in Pretoria a fortnight early and a set of headphones lighter. My sister picks me up and she says that she's late picking up her significant other. We pull into the shopping centre parking lot and I wait half an hour before the other party emerges from work instead of making a 5 minute detour to drop me off and in-so-doing making me late myself.
I pick up my car keys and my DVD collection and head out to a place that Steve's houseitting. Countless games of NHL later we fire up Army of Darkness. The next night is Tings an' Times where we stumble onto the idea of roadtripping. Drive out to Richards Bay take a swim in the Indian and drive back in time for Christmas. It's set for Thursday.
Thursdayarrivesandwe'vehadverylittlesleeppackedourstuffandchangedthedestinationtoBallito
Bjorn'sdrivinghisunclesA-classandSean'ssittingshotgunThere'sFooFightersplayingandwedrive
pastacarlyingonitsroofinafieldVanReenenspassisclearandwemakeabettoseewhocanseetheocean
firstIwinmyselfthreebeersandStevechangesthemusicWegettoUmhlangaat12:00andI'mdrunk
by14:00soImakeusfindaKFCandIorderforeveryoneinthelineOurmealarrivesandI'msurethat
"Ididn'tf*@kingorderthis"HeadingbacktoPorky'sIclimbintoaRussianBeartruckparkedoutside
thebottlestoreandmakefriendswithThembaandBonganiIheadtothebathroom40minuteslater
BjornfindsmeandImakesurethatweleaveIMMEDIAELYWe'rebackinthecarandweshootoverto
BallitoTakeaduskswimandIsoberupWechangeinthestreetforthepartyatBoston'sTherearethree
roundsofdrinksbeforeSteveandImolestthedancepoleonstageImeetTori(realnameVictoria)inthe
queueandchatuntilshewalksawaybecauseIforgethernameIrememberhernameandIleaveher
withanapologydrinkWedancesomemoreuntilTorifindsmeandwefindsomeseatsPlentyofdrinks
leadstothebathroomandIlearnthatBoston'sdoesn'thaveacondommachinesoit'sgoodbyetoTori
MeanwhileBjornSteveandSeanhavegoneacrossthestreetandleftmeatBoston'stogoacrossthe
streetWecallitanightanddriveourmobiletenttoLaMontagne'sparkinglotSeansays"We'vestillgot
thisbottleofStRaphael"Isay"Let'stakeittothebeach"Stevesays"Sure"locksthecarandgoestosleep
SeanandIemptythebottleandreminisceWegetbacktothecarandIwakeupwithSeansheadinmylap
myheadfeelslikecottonwoolandit'sbrightenoughttoblindamoleOnthewaytoShopriteStevetells
meabouthowwhenwegotbacktothecarSeandecidedtotakeamidnight(notrealtime)runthrough
theKZNstreetsIbuytheclosestpairofsunglassesanda2lIronBrewMyMomcallsme"Whereareyou?"
shesays"We'reinBallito"Isay"Areyoudrunk?Howlongareyoustaying?"Sheasks"Twonights"
Ireply"Youguysaremad"SheendsWebrunchatLaMontagne'spoolareaandappreciatethetwo-
leggedscenerybeforethedrivebacktoUmhlangaEnRoutewefindalovelyResidentsOnlybeach
andpretendtobeverypalelocalsMyneckisstillsorefromthetinysleepingareawhenwefinallygetto
UmhlangaWemeetfriendsatUmhlangaSandsanddecidetogotothestreetpartyThestreetpartyis
abustbutSeanwinsaG-stringthenweendupatapubthemusicisterriblebutthecompanyisgoodso
weleaveafterlastroundsSomejuvenilestuntswithashopingtrolleyearnmesomenewscarsandthe
nextstopistheA-ClassintheSandsparkinglotI'mspread-eagledinthepassengerseatBjornhasthe
G-stringonhisheadandSean'sfoundSteve'slapwhentwooldladiesfindusthenextmorningTheone
saystotheother"ShameDoyouthinktheseboysslepouthere"Stevewithhiseyesstillclosedsays
"YesMa'amwedid"TheyshaketheirheadsandwalkawayMydigitalcamerafindsitselfanewhome
andweprepareforthedrivehomeMyneckisstillkillingmewhenBjorn'sunclecallstofindoutwhere
heis"I'llcallyoubackwhenwegetbacktoPretoria"saysBjorn.
I pick up my car keys and my DVD collection and head out to a place that Steve's houseitting. Countless games of NHL later we fire up Army of Darkness. The next night is Tings an' Times where we stumble onto the idea of roadtripping. Drive out to Richards Bay take a swim in the Indian and drive back in time for Christmas. It's set for Thursday.
Thursdayarrivesandwe'vehadverylittlesleeppackedourstuffandchangedthedestinationtoBallito
Bjorn'sdrivinghisunclesA-classandSean'ssittingshotgunThere'sFooFightersplayingandwedrive
pastacarlyingonitsroofinafieldVanReenenspassisclearandwemakeabettoseewhocanseetheocean
firstIwinmyselfthreebeersandStevechangesthemusicWegettoUmhlangaat12:00andI'mdrunk
by14:00soImakeusfindaKFCandIorderforeveryoneinthelineOurmealarrivesandI'msurethat
"Ididn'tf*@kingorderthis"HeadingbacktoPorky'sIclimbintoaRussianBeartruckparkedoutside
thebottlestoreandmakefriendswithThembaandBonganiIheadtothebathroom40minuteslater
BjornfindsmeandImakesurethatweleaveIMMEDIAELYWe'rebackinthecarandweshootoverto
BallitoTakeaduskswimandIsoberupWechangeinthestreetforthepartyatBoston'sTherearethree
roundsofdrinksbeforeSteveandImolestthedancepoleonstageImeetTori(realnameVictoria)inthe
queueandchatuntilshewalksawaybecauseIforgethernameIrememberhernameandIleaveher
withanapologydrinkWedancesomemoreuntilTorifindsmeandwefindsomeseatsPlentyofdrinks
leadstothebathroomandIlearnthatBoston'sdoesn'thaveacondommachinesoit'sgoodbyetoTori
MeanwhileBjornSteveandSeanhavegoneacrossthestreetandleftmeatBoston'stogoacrossthe
streetWecallitanightanddriveourmobiletenttoLaMontagne'sparkinglotSeansays"We'vestillgot
thisbottleofStRaphael"Isay"Let'stakeittothebeach"Stevesays"Sure"locksthecarandgoestosleep
SeanandIemptythebottleandreminisceWegetbacktothecarandIwakeupwithSeansheadinmylap
myheadfeelslikecottonwoolandit'sbrightenoughttoblindamoleOnthewaytoShopriteStevetells
meabouthowwhenwegotbacktothecarSeandecidedtotakeamidnight(notrealtime)runthrough
theKZNstreetsIbuytheclosestpairofsunglassesanda2lIronBrewMyMomcallsme"Whereareyou?"
shesays"We'reinBallito"Isay"Areyoudrunk?Howlongareyoustaying?"Sheasks"Twonights"
Ireply"Youguysaremad"SheendsWebrunchatLaMontagne'spoolareaandappreciatethetwo-
leggedscenerybeforethedrivebacktoUmhlangaEnRoutewefindalovelyResidentsOnlybeach
andpretendtobeverypalelocalsMyneckisstillsorefromthetinysleepingareawhenwefinallygetto
UmhlangaWemeetfriendsatUmhlangaSandsanddecidetogotothestreetpartyThestreetpartyis
abustbutSeanwinsaG-stringthenweendupatapubthemusicisterriblebutthecompanyisgoodso
weleaveafterlastroundsSomejuvenilestuntswithashopingtrolleyearnmesomenewscarsandthe
nextstopistheA-ClassintheSandsparkinglotI'mspread-eagledinthepassengerseatBjornhasthe
G-stringonhisheadandSean'sfoundSteve'slapwhentwooldladiesfindusthenextmorningTheone
saystotheother"ShameDoyouthinktheseboysslepouthere"Stevewithhiseyesstillclosedsays
"YesMa'amwedid"TheyshaketheirheadsandwalkawayMydigitalcamerafindsitselfanewhome
andweprepareforthedrivehomeMyneckisstillkillingmewhenBjorn'sunclecallstofindoutwhere
heis"I'llcallyoubackwhenwegetbacktoPretoria"saysBjorn.
Labels: holiday, music, relationships, travel
At 09:42 Debaser mumbled incoherently.
5 Comments:
I do not regret the things I have done but those I did not do - Rory Cochrane as Lucas in Empire Records (and some other, far-more intelligent person before him).
Wow. Your mother's right, you are crazy! Sounds like fun though. Good thing you changed from Richard's Bay to Umhlanga/Ballito - there's not much to do in RBay.
It was the closest I've been to the "Rock & Roll" lifestyle. I heard bad things about Richards Bay's beaches.
We're planning on doing a few more of these trips this year. There were many personal jokes too but this is pretty much what happened.
Lucas is the man. (despite him saying "damn the man".) Love Empire Records!!
"I heard bad things about Richards Bay's beaches." Which beaches? Went there once... all I recall is the taste of tin in my mouth, a couple of dead sea birds and skies the colour of bread mould. Sounds like you had an awesome lost weekend, though - I'm quite jealous.
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