Regrets
Two weeks ago, I stopped by Jess's place on my way home from poker. We fought about the same bullshit and we decided to spend some time apart. I really thought that it would go smoother than it has.
While we were together I was often not around, neither physically nor mentally. This has finally caught up with me and I'm in a pretty dark place at the moment. We've spoken to and seen each other and I greatly regret how I often couldn't see the person that was right there with me. Even though I managed to exclude her from a large part of my life, I know now how much she has affected me and how much of my life she has become.
We had a big face-to-face session on Monday where so many of our issues came out and were resolved. I'm a person who places alot of value on honesty and on my word. It amazes me that despite running over these values with a big-rig, Jess still came to love me. I regret how now that I want to, even need to, show her how achingly much I love her and want to give to her, that my own word doesn't count for much.
One of my biggest regrets is that I've done some things that I was adamant I would never do. I appreciate that I've realised these things but I know that the cost of this is too high to describe.
We spent today together and worked out more issues. We went for lunch and had a great time together. I started to forget the pain. My outlook was very optimistic and things were so good. Considering the relationship emerging by the advantage taken on the rebound, my biggest fear is that it's all too late. It kills me.
P.S. Jess, I'm sorry about your car.
While we were together I was often not around, neither physically nor mentally. This has finally caught up with me and I'm in a pretty dark place at the moment. We've spoken to and seen each other and I greatly regret how I often couldn't see the person that was right there with me. Even though I managed to exclude her from a large part of my life, I know now how much she has affected me and how much of my life she has become.
We had a big face-to-face session on Monday where so many of our issues came out and were resolved. I'm a person who places alot of value on honesty and on my word. It amazes me that despite running over these values with a big-rig, Jess still came to love me. I regret how now that I want to, even need to, show her how achingly much I love her and want to give to her, that my own word doesn't count for much.
One of my biggest regrets is that I've done some things that I was adamant I would never do. I appreciate that I've realised these things but I know that the cost of this is too high to describe.
We spent today together and worked out more issues. We went for lunch and had a great time together. I started to forget the pain. My outlook was very optimistic and things were so good. Considering the relationship emerging by the advantage taken on the rebound, my biggest fear is that it's all too late. It kills me.
P.S. Jess, I'm sorry about your car.
At 17:27 Debaser mumbled incoherently.
3 Comments:
Okay, I have to ask these questions. By "time apart", do you mean broken up and free to have who ever you want, or is it the kind that you take time apart, then get back together to see if your time apart has helped?
It's nearer to a mixture of both these situations. There weren't any outright rules made and so the distinction between the two is extremely blurred.
I think it's best described as "broken up until further notice".
Do I know you?
Yar, I kan like to be tommo :)
I was just wondering what the terms were. I know I've "had time apart" with a few of my girlfriends and unfortunately for me it never seems to solve any problems. Here's to hoping it does for you, if that's what you want...
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